I feel like I got kicked out of a clique. That’s the honest truth. I’ve never been one for sugar-coating.
When I wrote regularly on my previous blog (which I won’t link to because I’m clinging to hope that this one can remain anonymous) I had a lot of followers. And among those followers, I had lots of commenters. And among those commenters, I had many regular email-ers. But I feel like 95% of you have disappeared on me.
I mean, I get it. It was hard for me when a fellow TTC-er got pregnant. I simply couldn’t relate to her anymore. I still have nothing but love in my heart for each and every dear friend I made along the way. But I get it. I really do. Sometimes people are put in our lives to serve a specific purpose–even if that purpose is support for what we are going through at that time. When one person or the other moves on I like to think that it frees up space in both their heart and life to go on and support someone else. It’s like once big circle, or something. Kumbaya. Or whatever.
But I have to admit that starting from scratch sucks. Trying to find other bloggers in a similar situation to me feels next to impossible. Don’t get me wrong, there are a handful of lovely ladies that have already reached out to me and their support (as we get to know one another) means the world. But I miss my ladies. I guess that’s what it comes down to. I miss you. Yes, YOU.
Even if you can’t offer a word of advice or anything positive at all, please just say hi. That’s all I really need. I have experienced so much loss in the last 6 months of my life. The loss of my husband and my baby is insurmountable. But to lose a single one of you ladies who have become my sounding boards, my support system, and some of my dearest friends feels like a weight to heavy to bear on top of everything else.
I miss you.